a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
