Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
