used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
