Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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