Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
