i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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