:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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