he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
