brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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