Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
