he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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