There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
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