well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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