I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
where are my pants?
in the oven.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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