HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
