The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
