you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
