honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I think people are normalizing furries
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
