the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
