No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
