OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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