New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
