I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
