The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Success! We fucked roommates!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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