it's too hot outside to masturbate.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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