He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
