This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
