Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
