I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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