His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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