I'm lost and stupid without you.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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