his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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