rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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