it hurts more in the daytime
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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