if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
