OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just found puke in my bra..
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
