Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I think my moral compass just broke
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