Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
