I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
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