Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
