if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
