24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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