just tell him i said nine months
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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