your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
