I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
