i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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