no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
