How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
