Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
