yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
