wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
