so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
